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The average male orgasm lasts for 7 seconds while the average female orgasm lasts for 20 seconds! Trying to figure out if I got robbed being born male...

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September 2020
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Too much, too soon…

 
I know that my last entry focused on giving out TMI (too much information), but lets take a look at the problem from the other side.  What about when someone fails to disclose information early enough. Here’s the scenario: a good friend of mine called me up last night, extremely frantic and worked up because a woman that he has been dating for 4 months finally revealed to him that she has an STD. Unfortunately, they have been having sex for 2 months, the only saving grace being that it isn’t one of the life threatening diseases. My friend promptly made a doctor’s appointment to get himself checked out and is now nervously awaiting the results.

So the issue is “when should she have told him that she had an STD?” Clearly after intercourse is WAY too late, and I’d offer that the first date is WAY too soon. I’m sure that if you asked her, she would have a host of excuses as to why she waited to tell him: “I don’t know him well enough to share my personal information,” “I like him, and if I tell him now, he might not want to see me again,” or even “it’s not that big a deal, no need to rock the boat now.” In her mind, she had good reasons to put my friend’s health at risk, but in my opinion she was absolutely irresponsible. There is no way that she should have ever laid down with him without first disclosing the facts to him and allowing him to make an informed decision.

I admit, even as someone who has never been in that situation, that it’s a tough call. That being said, we still have a responsibility to act well…. responsibly and provide our dating partners with all of the relevant information to allow them to make decisions that are in their own best interests.  Even if those choices don’t work out best for us. And that just doesn’t cover STD’s but any serious medical information that you know that the other person deserves to be made aware of (so go ahead and tell that woman about your bouts with chronic flatulence, your tendencies towards kleptomania, and the fact that you were born with a tail). I also include in the ‘must disclose group’ folks that withhold relevant medical history; such things as family history of mental illness, or tendencies towards alcohol abuse for example.

The bottom line is that we need to allow people to make informed decisions about how far they want to go with us on the whole dating journey. Before we allow our partners to go too far or get in too deep, give them the facts. It may just surprise you that they still want you anyway…

I’m just saying…


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